Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 7, 8 & 9—

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 7, 8 & 9—

Tilt into Thursday! Change is healthy, stepping out of your comfort zone can be scary but when you push yourself to go beyond, you will grow. 2020 has challenged many of us go change and be uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable and stressful, my office had to change locations and move 26 years of hundreds of clients files with limited help to stay safe and keep the covid-19 risk low. We were sad to move—change is hard but it is important to embrace the change and from here only growth is ahead of us. Accept what life throws at you and conquer it the best way you can for you never know what cool surprises will turn up. The silver lining is our new location is very close by and we didn’t not have to move outside of San Francisco.

#2020Selfreflection

ID: [Picture of Zahna doing a tilt on pointe looking down towards the ground. She is wearing a black long sleeve shirt, white tutu, pink tights, orange scarf and her hair is down. The background is scenic of the Golden Gate Bridge.]

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 5 & 6—

 Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 5 & 6—

Tonight, here in San Francisco, the lockdown starts again. I’ll still be going to work tomorrow as an essential worker. I will never forget those days in March driving to work on Market Street and it was a ghost town. I grew up here and I had never seen it like that my whole life.

To follow, work did not get easier. Due to the pandemic, we got the equivalent of 8 new cases for small office of two staff. I was working 50 hours during the weekdays and spent my weekends writing for grants with the dance company. This also happened to be grants season and we had to reimagine how to support the dance company and the Deaf Dance Festival during a pandemic after the loss and cancellation of work. All dance studios were closed, there was no dance classes. When virtual dance classes popped up they were inaccessible for Deaf people until my Deaf director started teaching in June. After working all week and weekends during the first few months, I needed to let off some steam. So sometimes late on Saturday nights after writing all day—I would dance in my home. It’s exactly what I needed to keep me going.

In performance, my director will say its okay to dance when you are happy, its okay to dance when you’re sad and its okay to dance when you’re angry. Imagine the world peace we would have if everyone just danced it out.

#2020Selfreflection

ID: [1 minute and 12 second video excerpt of Zahna wearing red leggings and sports bra with white trim, her hair is in a ponytail and she is dancing. The background is corner view of the room with wood floor, cream colored wall and 1 full window, 1 partial window with blinds and white trim.]

https://www.facebook.com/zahna.simon/videos/10165106687530179

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 4—

 Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 4—

I truly miss traveling. In 2019 I honestly lost count of how many times I traveled for work to perform. It was once a month and some months up to three weekends a month—I loved every minute of it and I miss it dearly. The lockdown happened 3 days after returning from Minneapolis which turned out to be my last 2020 tour and the last time I performed on stage in front of audiences in March. I was living my dream…

Looking back to when I graduated from college, I had decided not to pursue a professional dance career after experiencing a lot of audism in dance and instead focused on my career for several years as a chemist in the pharmaceutical industry in San Diego. I loved my job, I loved my life, I was grateful for what I had but I felt something was missing. I still had a dream to perform while traveling the world and dancing in a company with other Deaf dancers like me. While it seemed impossible at the time…Imagine my delight when that dream came TRUE!

I count my blessings and grab the opportunities in the little time I have in safely exploring new places in my hometown and revisiting beautiful places that I haven’t seen since I was a child. This makes me appreciate what I have, live authentically and seize opportunities. Continue to spread positivity, love and happiness because only light drives out the darkness. Once we get through this together, I look forward to my next flight out.

#2020Selfreflection

ID: [2 pictures, 1 video: 1st Picture of Zahna wearing a blue with gray trim leotard, white tutu, black tennis shoes and green mask. Her hair is in a ponytail and she is in a lunge. Her arms in second with head and body reaching back. Background is a lake in a forest.

2nd picture of scenic downtown San Francisco facing the bay from high up. Clouds are in the sky, the sun is shining bright on the upper right.

30 sec video of 7 adorable raccoons in a park gathering together hoping people will feed them. 2 more raccoons join them and they are CUTE( video viewable on FB https://www.facebook.com/590825178/videos/pcb.10165098279180179/10165098277910179/)]

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 3—

 Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 3—

Today I planned to write something else…This morning I went to work with an idea of what I would be working on today—those ideas got thrown out of the window. In my job, we are conservators, trustees of clients where we handle their finances, medical care, overall life and wellbeing and also administer estates handling beneficiaries, clearing out houses preparing to sell them. Basically its handling several peoples’ lives and estates on a daily basis which can change any instant. This morning I found out two clients went to the hospital, they are isolated and upset because their caregivers can’t accompany them due to the Covid restrictions. Then in the office all the copiers, tech, printers decided to go down today. The uncertainty of my job often throws me off and derails me from the original schedule. This happens almost everyday, definitely every week. It’s the nature of my job and I’m used to it as I just have to flow with the changes. It feels like I’m on an island in the middle of a busy street with everything moving fast around me & I move, flow, dance through each task and each problem while doing my best to stay positive.

2020 is a perfect example for people experiencing their entire life and plans derailed. Tomorrow is not a guarantee and you truly never know what it will bring. For me it’s important to remember that the only thing I can do is my very best, appreciate my blessings and that I can’t be perfect and its okay. No one is perfect.

One of my favorite quotes from my Director “Do your best and make plenty of mistakes. On a good day you are beautiful and on a bad day you are still beautiful.”

#2020Selfreflection

(Camera Emoji):

Brandy Mimms

ID: [Picture of Zahna wearing a red leotard with partial lace across the top, black leggings with her hair down and on pointe in profile view with right leg in front. She has her back leg bent up and touching her pointe shoe with her right arm. Her left arm is bent and touching the pillar. Background is a busy city street and Z is on the divider in between the road which also has flowers showing behind her.]

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 2—

 Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. —Day 2—

My heart aches for the stage, for a live audience and for the connections and energy that come with performing. It energizes and revitalizes my mind and my body. I’ve always had to juggle between my 4 jobs and that was exhausting but in a good way because performing, dancing and teaching all balanced my life, mind, body and soul. The pandemic broke up the stage from performers and it cuts deeply. I finally did perform on a stage for Spiral Dance on Halloween with livestream audiences. That night I FaceTimed with a friend and “Zahna, you are positively glowing.” This affirms that I know exactly where I belong—in performance. I continue to stay hopeful and know that one day in safety and steps we will return to the stage and live audiences.

I am reminded of when I was a little girl performing in the nutcracker—I even loved performing then. I told my mom I wanted to perform for strangers and on a bigger stage. She told me that the audience was strangers because I don’t know everyone there. I said no mom, I know the people are mostly parents and family of the other kids—I want to perform for like hundreds of complete strangers. Little did I know I would end up performing globally for thousands of audiences.

#2020Selfreflection #urbanjazzdancecompany

ID: [Picture of Zahna performing on a black stage in a black leotard and shorts wearing tan tights and pointe shoes. She is on the ground with her right leg propping up her body in a bridge and her left leg in the air. Her hair is in a bun, her right arm reaches up to the ceiling.]

Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020.

 Dancing through life, the final 31 days of 2020. If 2020 is a natural phenomenon, it’s been a hurricane to say the least. Everyone has had their own struggles this year. There’s been so many times when I wanted to express myself or share my mind and I didn’t because I had to work average 10-15 hours a day or I was too exhausted from working. For the next 30 days, I’m going to do my own journey of reflection for 2020. It can be happy, it can be sad, it can be whatever I feel that day as long as I am doing it for myself. I invite you to join me by reading my posts, commenting, sharing your thoughts or maybe you’d like to do your own journey of reflection. There’s no rules, no limits, just be you.

Use Hashtag: #2020Selfreflection

ID: [Picture of Zahna wearing a long sleeve black shirt, orange scarf around neck, white tutu, pink tights, pointe shoes, hair down. Front leg croise to the front, back leg in plié, arms in fourth with the right arm in front and the left arm behind and she is bending over. Background is scenic San Francisco with Golden Gate Bridge.]